This blog will explain why ego has no place in leadership, why confidence does and how this applies to your leadership style. Part one discussed why ego has no place in leadership. Part two will explained just how to stop using your ego and start displaying confidence. Part three wraps up this three part blog with exactly what dropping ego and displaying confidence gives you as a leader.
Part One, Two and Three are all available to read!
George Washington was unanimously elected president of the United States in the first presidential election in 1789. Washington won, with 69 electoral votes, the support of each participating elector. Washington, though filled with great worry and anxiety, made presidential history and explained that “the voice of my country called me.”
D. Jason Berggren, Professor at Georgia South western State University writes that during Washington’s presidential oath on April 30, 1789, “with a hand on the Bible, a ‘sacred volume’ borrowed from a local Masonic lodge and subsequently known as the George Washington Inaugural Bible, [Washington] said, “I, George Washington, do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute the Office of President of the United States, and will to the best of my ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States.”
The statements from Washington did one major thing. It gave the power back to the people who swore him in. Washington demonstrated that he was there to serve his country. This creates trust which led Washington to hold his Presidency for nine years. Bob Davids said that “when you give back the power, [the people] provide more support which provides you with more power.” It takes confidence, not ego, to be able to give the power back. Giving the power back creates trust.
There are some who may argue that ego paired with compassion is good for a leader. I would argue that this in itself is contradictory. Ego is centred on self-interest and compassion in the interest of the other person. By acting as if you are interested in their interest but really you are only interested in your personal gain you will come across as unauthentic and manipulative. People will be able to spot you a mile off and this will ruin the relationships you hold, whereas displaying confidence will help you build relationships.
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Gordon B Hinckley, American religious leader, author and 15th President of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, when speaking about marital problems and divorce, that “selfishness to be the root cause of most of it.” According to the Office of National Statistics, the most common reason in the United Kingdom in 2017 for divorce, was “unreasonable behaviour.” Could selfishness or egotistical behaviours be considered as unreasonable? A behaviour that destroys relationships? In my experience, ego destroys relationships in the long term.
Using egotism may help you in the short term, for example, during an interview. Demonstrating egotistical behaviours may make you sound impressive but in the long term, which could be a few days to a few months, the impression wears off. People grow tired and bored of selfish behaviours.
I recall this exact scenario taking place on a project on mine. A new person, Mike, was brought in to ‘manage’ a section of work, and in the first coordination meeting sounded very impressive. Mike spoke of all the great things he had previously done and how he could implement them here. The ego shone through, something I could not see at the time. After a couple of months it was evident that the façade was for show. Mike was not interested in helping the project as he only cared for how good his section looked. Over time Mike became disliked by the project team, was not meeting targets and was detrimental to the project. He was later removed from his position.
Gary Vaynerchuk, serial entrepreneur and social media icon, regularly advocates and stresses the importance of focusing on the customer by providing value. When we focus only on ourselves, over time we break the bridge connecting us and them. Demonstrating ego destroys relationships. When we demonstrate confidence by focusing on the other person, we build relationships.
Thanks for reading, JT.
How to reference this page
Toor, J. (2019). Confidence and ego in leadership, part three. Available at: https://pmgrowth.co/confidence-and-ego-in-leadership,-part-three
Inspirations
- Gary Vaynerchuk serial entrepreneur and social media icon
- D. Jason Berggren, Professor at Georgia South western State University
- George Washington, 1st President of the United States of America
- Office of National Statistics. Available at: https://www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/birthsdeathsandmarriages/divorce/bulletins/divorcesinenglandandwales/2017
- Gordon B Hinckley, American religious leader, author and 15th President of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints