This blog will explain why ego has no place in leadership, why confidence does and how this applies to your leadership style.
To be clear confidence and ego are not the same thing. Being egotistical is to tailor every situation tailor to your own self-interest. Having confidence is to feel or believe in yourself and others. There is a difference. Ego should not have a place in management, leadership or any area of work.
Part One, Two and Three are all available to read!
Sports is an area where there is a fine line between confidence and ego. Alec Fenn, writer for BBC Sport, writes how Prince Naseem Hamed, who was the world’s best featherweight boxer between 1997 and 2000 ruined his career by becoming “lost in the fog of his own hype and cut corners in training, resulting in the only defeat of his career to Marco Antonio Barrera in 2001.” Prince Naseem Hamed, who retired shortly after his defeat in 2002, was famous for his showmanship and skill, but what would have happened if he did not allow his ego to overtake his confidence?
He had let down his team and coaches who have poured years of emotional energy and effort into the boxer, who let his ego run his life unchecked, eventually ending his boxing career.
As a leader, it is important to be aware of whether you are displaying confidence or ego as leaning to much towards ego can destroy your likeability factor, the trust of others in you and relationships.
Confidence makes you likeable, authentic and trustworthy, whereas ego does the opposite. Picture yourself leading a presentation to a room of Directors, full of confidence. How does it feel? Great right? You feel as if you have full control of the room, you praise the team, people are fully engaged and interested in you and what you have to say. Your words are having an impact.
Now picture being in that same meeting and an egotistical manager, James, walks in late. James starts texting, making cheap comments and keeps referring to how this impacts him and how he could do it better. James starts to turn the focus of the meeting from your presentation, towards himself. He turns the presentation into the James show only talking about himself. You think (politely speaking) ‘I really do not like James’. You are not the only one as everyone else in the room will be thinking the same thing.
The confidence you were displaying makes people interested in you, it makes you likeable. The ego shown by James makes people dislike him. I know this because I have been there many times. I have seen many people like James, and so will you.
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It’s important to not fall into the trap. Often egotistical people like to draw people in with their comments to break your confidence which makes them look better. Be self-aware of these people and do not be drawn into confrontation with them. Egotistical people love to argue and fight. That kind of behaviour may seem ‘cool’ in school, but in reality, people dislike it.
Your confidence as a leader will also show in the language you use and connections you make. Part two will explain just how to be different and be confident.
Thanks for reading, JT.
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How to reference this page
Toor, J. (2019). Confidence and ego in leadership, part one. Available at: https://pmgrowth.co/confidence-and-ego-in-leadership,-part-one/(opens in a new tab)
Inspirations
- Alec Fenn