Have you got big dreams? Have you got big goals that you want to achieve? You’re working hard to achieve them, but the people around you trying to bring you down!? Is this making it difficult, extra stress that you don’t need? Over the past 10 years I’ve experienced the same. In this post I want to share with you three steps on how to overcome this problem. Interested? Read on.
Throughout my journey so far I’ve always aimed high. Maybe it’s something I learnt from my parents, but I’ve always looked at a big challenge and said to myself “I can do that”. It was never that smooth though. I’ve had people trying to hold me back. Here’s some of the things people have said to me in the past:
- “You think you’re better than me”
- “That’s impossible”
- “You can’t do that”
- “When you fail you can always come back”
- “You’re not at that level”
- “It’s too difficult”
- “What makes you so special?”
- “You need to be more realistic”
- “I don’t think you’re ready”
- “You don’t deserve it”
- “They gave you the position because of diversity”
- And the list goes on…
I’ve had my fair share of negativity in my life and I’m sure you have too. Here’s the three steps to overcome the problem so that that you can fly past these people and achieve what you want in life.
Cut them out
This is probably the toughest one. This step is exactly as the heading suggest. If they are bad for you, cut them out of your life. However, this can be difficult because the person you could be cutting out could be your “best friend” or your sibling. But, if they’re holding you back, always bringing you back down to “where you come from” or surround you with negative energy, then you may need to cut them out of your life. Think of it like smoking or eating fast food. If we allow those bad habits to consume our life it costs us, not only our health and sanity, but also money!
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Limit them
This is the next step. If you cannot cut these people out of your life, for example a parent, limit the amount of time you spend with them. If you see them every day, limit them to once a week. If you see them once a week, limit them to once a month. If you see them once a month, limit them to once every 3-6 months. It’s the same as trying to limit a bad habit. Instead of having a fast food burger every day, in order to lose weight you must limit how much you consume!
Ignore them
If you can’t cut them out or limit them, ignore them. For example, a colleague or your boss, learn the ignore them. Here’s two phrases that will help:
- “F*ck what they say”
- “In one ear, out the other”
It takes practice and may be difficult as you may think you “need” that person, such as your boss. But remember, if someone is going to help you see happiness and success, they support you with positivity, not bring you down with negativity.
Ultimately, it is your choice. You can decide if you want to remain around negativity or surround yourself with positivity. You are in control. I do promise you one thing, work through these levels and you will see exponential growth, increased happiness, more time and greater success.
If people keep bringing you down and you let them, then you are managing your life. But, if you adopt these steps then you will become a leader in your life and take your personal development to the next level.
Thanks for reading, JT.
Do you want to learn how to apply leadership to your personal development? My book will help you!