Welcome to part three of this series of posts where I tackle quick fire leadership questions. I receive lots of questions from various platforms which require concise answers. So in this series I will be sharing my responses to these questions.
Did you miss part one to six?
Question 1: “How do I become a leader that no one will forget?” – Adriana Moraes
The first step is to understand and develop influence. Influence is the currency of leadership. Influence is gained through the development of strong connections and trust from others. Memorable leaders are ones which form both of these elements with others.
The next step is to understand what to do with the power gained. When a leader develops higher levels of influence they in turn gain power. If they chose to use the power for personal gain then eventually the influence will dwindle or collapse – think about Donald Trump. If a leader choses to use their power to help others grow and succeed then the trust and connections formed will deepen, leading to more influence and more power – think Martin Luther King.
People remember people who they form deep connections with and trust.
Question 2: “Must a leader be compassionate towards other people to be a good leader?” – Mary Scott
Compassion is a form of displaying empathy which is critical in leadership. This is because leadership support is grown through the development of relationships. Apathy can destroy your relationship, whereas displaying leadership behaviours of empathy will help you connect better and build strong relationships.
I’d like to share a personal story on this topic. Looking back on my younger self I was quite apathetic. I wasn’t completely cold and numb to people’s feelings and beliefs, no, quite the opposite, I could completely appreciate how people felt, but I did nothing about it. So in my opinion, I was displaying apathy rather than empathy. This was a problem as it was stopping me from building deeper and more meaningful relationships. I wanted to change this about myself and did. I attended a communication seminar which allowed me to go on change where my feelings were coming from, and this may sound cheesy, but it worked. I spent time disconnecting from my thoughts and connection with my feelings.
By doing this I continued to feel empathy towards others feelings, but now I would act on it. I would spend more time talking, understanding and listening, rather than assuming. This allowed me to develop deeper connections with others which led to greater levels of influence, which is important as a leader.
Question 3: “What, if anything, stops you from leading authentically?” – Anon
Many leaders may feel that they always behave and lead authentically. However, for the majority, if not all leaders, this is a false sense of security because as people there are many factors which can change our actions in any given moment. That is why I see three key factors which answer your question:
- Continual self-awareness
- Misalignment to values
- Lack of discipline
As I mentioned, our mood in any given moment may affect our decision making. For example, a new bad experience may change the way we behave today than yesterday. Although as leaders we know this is not the right way to act, we may not immediately be aware of our actions. Therefore, self-awareness is key here. Without it, we may miss subtle changes in the way we lead.
Our core values define who we are and how we lead. Changes in circumstance or an external influence may force us to act in a way that misaligned to our core values. If this happens, then you are not leading authentically.
Leaders face on-going challenges that will test ones resolve to stay aligned to who they are as a leader. A lack of discipline may create a situation where leaders act unauthentically.
I will always be open to tackling challenging leadership questions, so if you have a burning question please do reach out and I will write a response.
Thank you for reading, JT
